Experiencing life from a whole new vantage point. . .
Monday, February 13, 2012
Dae: Yes, but then she would complain that i never get her any flowers or candy or chocolates and my coworker got a GIANT bouquetwhydon'tyoueverdoanythingthoughtfulformewhyisitsohardtofindagoodmannotthatyouaren'tagoodmanbutyoucouldbemorethoughtfulwoulditKILLYOUtobealittlemorethoughtfulespeciallyafterallthosebedroomthingsidoforyouevenwheni'mnotinthemoodireallydon'tthinkit'sthatbigadealbutifyouwanttogowatchthesportsballgamewithyourbuddiesfinei'lljuststayhereandbesadandalonebecausethat'swhatyoureallywantanyhowisn'titohmygodishouldhavemarriedJames.
MJ: Let me tell it to you this way: Don't waste money on a day when romance is EXPECTED. Obligation does not equal romance. Send her a simple bouquet of flowers on some random day of the year with a note that says, "Just Because." Then she will appreciate you. And that's much more adventurous than "Ohgreatit'sFebruary14thIhopeI canstillfindacardandflowersathegrocerystoreonmywayhomefromwork."
I was in my old neighborhood the other day and drove down the street I lived on from ages 2 until 23. My mom lived there until she passed away 4 years ago. What a pleasant surprise to see a group of exuberant kids at the bottom of the driveway of the house I knew most of my life.
"LEMONADE!!! Pleeeeeease stop!" they shouted at me as I slowed down and grinned at them. I pulled over and asked, "Do you live here? This is my old house. I grew up here!" The 10-year-old girl who matched the dad and little brother up near the house looked at me in surprise.
I chose lemonade from their poster board menu. "Give her a crazy straw!" they all shouted to the concessionaire. I paid and was handed a purple cup of fresh-squeezed lemonade (complete with floating lemon seeds) and a blue swirly straw that was way too big for the cup.
"Have a nice day!" they shouted as I pulled away from the curb.
I sipped the lemonade as I drove back home, and a tear came to my eye. How many lemonade stands did we have throughout the years in that very same spot? We never could imagine any other family but ours living at 680 Hazelvalley. Now a new family with new kids has taken our place. What a refreshing feeling to "meet" the new tenants and see that they are continuing the tradition in the house that built me.
My daughters are going to their dad's tonight for their new blended-family Christmas pictures. I have lots of friends and family with blended families. This is not a new concept to me. It just feels really odd that my girls will be in a family picture without me!
I struggle with this perception: This man took a vow to be faithful to only me, till death do us part. He slept with numerous women while we were still married (all the while pretending to be the good husband). Now he skips off into the sunset with a new wife and family. Something is truly wrong with this picture.
And it's not just me. I see this happening in today's society all too often. People are throwing away their marriages with a casual toss at the slightest sign of boredom or problems. Where is the commitment? Are there none that are faithful and want to work out their problems anymore in this day and age?
Thanksgiving is fast becoming my next favorite time of year after Christmas. What used to be just a prelude to the big holiday season, has now become a time of reflection and gratitude for me, finding myself thankful even for the difficult times. I continue to be amazed at God's goodness and how He is turning a tragedy in my life right around into a most beautiful thing.
And why did I try to hang on so long to something that made me so miserable? Because change is difficult and requires us to stretch ourselves and move beyond what we are used to--even if it's uncomfortable, cramped, and suffocating in the little box of life we resign ourselves to.
The horizon before me ever widens as time moves on. And this inexplicable sense of liberty keeps expanding as I move forward. There is still much in me that needs to change, and I'm not disillusioned to think everything will be pie in the sky. I know there will be difficult times ahead. Such is life. But I like the view I have in front of me, and I'm looking forward to the surprises God has in store.
The computer gurus at Blogger have come up with this addicting Blogger Play which features pictures currently being uploaded to Blogger. Be aware that you have no idea what pics may show up in case you're easily offended! Click on a pic you like. It will take you to the blog where it's from. How cool is that?
“The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears, or the sea.” - Isak Dineson